The Wills Session Crowd Fund

We need your help in completing the new album from Ezra, “the wills sessions: History of love.” Become a part of this event.
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After the divorce of my first wife, I was devastated, and I could not imagine that I would ever love again. Before this event I was very confidant young man but when she decided to leave me, the rejection I felt in my own person and the guilt of my own wrong doings, eventually lead to such a low confidence in myself and my image that I could hardly look another in the eye during a conversation. Even over my second marriage loomed a dark cloud of my unworthiness—unworthy of happiness, unworthy of love. Kickstarter for Wills Session 


I went through the normal anger and despair as most do in a pending divorce, but I refused this time to quit loving her. But not in the way of trying to win her back, beg cheat or steal her, but in the way of allowing her to be her own person, and to make her own hard decisions and a true attempt to remove my own feelings of ownership that sometimes come with marriage. In short..to let her BE. lectus, tempus et mi vel, ornare cursus tortor.

 

ez-squareIf the divorce to my first wife was unbearable, I don’t even know how to categorize the loss of my second wife. People were angry with me that I did not react in a mournful way as most think a divorce of such magnitude should deserve. But they did not understand, and neither did I, that this was so beyond devastating, that it bled into another dimension of pain and rejection that the only proper reaction is that of dumbfoundment and resolve.

This history of love is still being written, every day there is a new act, a new plot twist, heartbreak or ecstasy.. I’m ready for it all. Ready for love without my own presumptions of what it is. Goto the Kickstarter Campaign

 



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We will be giving this album in mp3 form away for free, but you will need to either Subscribe to the Ezra Vancils Wills Session Newsletter and mailing list, be a Patron at patreon.com/ezravancil, or be in the crowd fund!

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. When my friends gave me condolences on my second wife filing for divorce, unless I was in the middle of a perceived threat, I always said, well… I don’t blame her, she had good reason to leave. Other times, like a child I called her names, I was back and forth between anger, self pity, and resolve, but like an adult, sometimes, I was rational, and like a person and her life long friend, sometimes, I was filled with love for her, and understanding of her choice to leave.

 

I had put her through much, and I think people that asked why she left, really knew why, and didn’t blame her much either. I had a hard past, and even though I had changed, and had over come my demons, it was too late, or at least, felt too late. I sometimes felt like she looked at me and our marriage, as a little girl would, an I was like this shiny new Ken doll Santa gave her, and before Christmas was over, his head fell off, and she had to tape it on and live with this deformed doll for the rest of the year. Because I did break, or really I think I was broken when she found me, she just refused to see it.


The videos we’re shot during the making of the album.. so they are the real sessions for the most part.

 

We wanted to capture very real moments of connection in music, not perfection.. so some takes were recorded live.

The strangest part about the sessions might of been the accidental reunion of Leslie with her Ex-Husband ..and his performance on the album on cello.


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So who is the redhead ez? Help us Crowd fund this album!

As with most of my stories of my own life, they are usually a little confusing and disjointed, because that is really how my life seems. The wills sessions are a group of songs that I recorded the summer during the time I was going through the divorce I speak of. Leslie Wills a close friend and a musical partner from my first musical endeavor when I was just 15 years old, was kind enough to pour herself into this project with me. And, it’s no accident that she fits so well with this project, she too had faced her second divorce and has remarkably similar love/marriage experiences.

 

She also has influenced my own writing, and wrote some of the album with me. The songs are about the different stages of love and a marriage that falls into disarray, from infatuation to dissolution, but strangely the album is filled with hope, and though sometimes it finds it sef in the confusion and heart break, others it sees a bright future.

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